You are older than you are

My Dear Echo,

You shared your first smile when you were one week old. It was a conscious smile, intended for me. Within a week or two, you started imitating my face - you stuck your tongue out, as you watched me stick out mine. You pursed your lips into a kiss, as you watched me do the same:

You are happiest when you push yourself up to standing with our support. You look down at your legs with a smile of achievement that's different than your other smiles, and then, into our eyes. We can tell you're proud of yourself, and you feel even more proud as you notice our amazement and congratulatory remarks. You're not even 2 months old.

You also started "talking" to me with consistent sounds. I reply with regular language, and so we carry a conversation only a baby and mommy can share.

You are calm, so you give yourself a chance to observe your surroundings, quiet, and with eyes wide open - your eyes are so big! - and you are amazed at what you see. We wonder what crosses through your mind.

You are too young for all this.

Wherever I go, people from every age and gender stop me and comment on on you. "You probably hear this all the time, but you have the cutest baby." "Your baby is adorable." "Aww, so cute." "She looks so grown up." "She is so alert." In return, you give them your beaming smile.

You had a rough day yesterday, with 4 vaccines. 3 shots in the legs and 1 drop in the mouth. You were sleepy, a little cranky, and had some fever. It's hard to be a baby. But you made it through. My lovely little girl.

Kiss,
Mommy

Welcome to the world, Echo

My Echo,

We've been waiting for you to complete our family. You kept us waiting for three extra days, and those felt like weeks. I was worried that you'd be too big to come out easily, your dad wanted to meet you already, and your sister was getting sad that her baby and playmate was not here yet. When you did decide to arrive, you came quickly and quietly.

A sunny June 18 after days of rain. I was on the couch, surfing and casually timing the contractions I've been feeling for the last 2-3 weeks. "Not strong enough for labor" I thought. Following that thought, an unfamiliar pop and painful wetness. My water never broke with your sister, so I was totally unprepared for this horrible sensation. "Not on the carpet" I whispered in my head, and dragged myself on my knees to the hardwood floor. The phone was left miles away on the couch, and  knew papa might not hear it ring as he was picking up Zoe from school on the bike.

Doctors tell you to time your contractions to know how close you are to delivery. But once you have given birth, you know from the degree of pain how close you are to the end, and I knew I had no time. Before this moment, I told myself that if I can't reach dad, or if he is farther away, I'll just suck it up and drive myself to the hospital. Crouched on the floor, that was not going to happen. I reached for the phone and pressed the single button it takes to dial dad, hating the traffic that must have trapped him. "Is it time?" he said as soon as he picked up the phone. "Yes, how far are you?" "We're very close" he said, and I heard the garage door open.

Something stressful about driving to a hospital during rush hour traffic. Thirty minutes later we were at the hospital door. 60 minutes later, at 7:11PM Pacific time, you were in my arms. "Mom! A baby just came out of your snooch!" your sister declared. "She is so small,"I said,several times, worried. "Is she preemie size?" I asked. "She is just fine," they said. I had hard time believing. 'Is she breathing?" I asked? "Yes" they said. "Why is she not crying?" I asked. "Why is the doctor not smacking her?" I thought. Nobody seemed to understand why I was worried. You looked so small and you were so quiet. Why didn't you cry? Only in the next few days, as I got to know you I understood... You are just a peaceful baby. Your presence sooths me. I'm so lucky that you are mine.

Papa and I were surprised that only after a few minutes, you opened your eyes. you looked like a mini human who's been through life. We positioned you on my chest, and you nursed for two long hours until the nurse came to take your vitals.

You were born 6lb 12oz (3.65kg) and 19.5 inches (almost 50 cm). You have been making us smile ever since.

Love
Mommy