My Love Echo,
You are growing tall and beautiful, your curls dancing on your head, water-falling on your pretty face. Most days you refuse a hair clip or hair tie and want your hair free, like your soul. Once in a while, you let me put a pretty pin, which makes you look like a doll. You are in the Butterflies class now - Parparim in Hebrew. You've been there since you turned three. AS you see, I haven't been writing in your blog. My job at Amazon is all consuming, and I rather spend every available minute with you girls than writing about you. Plus by the time I get to sit down at night, I'm exhausted. But I still cherish every single thing you do or say.
Yesterday you had your very first play date with your friend Alice. You are both in the Parparim class, and often play together. You re too young to know about play dates, but you always see Zoe having friends over for play dates and sleepovers, or her going to her friends' houses. One day you declared that you wanted to have a play date too. "With Alice!" you said. I talked to her mom, and we arranged a play date at our place. It took a couple of weeks to find a date that worked for both families, so again, we encountered that complicated concept of time. You insisted that the play date is today, or tomorrow, and each time, I tried explaining to you that it is in two weeks, in a week, tomorrow... I was grateful when the day came. Another challenge was the location of the play date. Since we came up with the idea, we had to invite Alice to our place. But you wanted to go to her house. Explaining social norms to a 3 year old is no easy undertaking. Until the minute Alice showed up at our door, you insisted we go to her place. I was worried that you might not welcome her. But you did. You were both at disbelief and happy to see each other. I think that's when it downed on you both that you were having a play date. Unlike Zoe's play dates, I couldn't leave the room, though at first I attempted to. You girls decided to play with your stove, cooking supplies, and the picnic basket. You both kept bringing more and more food to the living room for me to eat. There were also occasions where you two would argue about taking turns using a toy, so it worked better that I joined you. Alice was more willing to share compared to you, but I think this is because the play date was at your place, with your toys, so you had stronger feelings of ownership, and more affected by the idea of sharing.
Overall, the experience was a success. When Alice's mom came to pick her up, she started crying and you didn't want her to go. So we all hung out in the living room for a while longer as you girls played with the spinning red chair, and took turns spinning each other. Us the moms took turns as well, spinning you both at the same time. This was your favorite game.
By the way, Nonna and Nonno are visiting from Italy, and you are not very friendly. "Go away!" you tell Nonna. Or just yell at her if she starts talking to you while you are on a mission to come to me, watch a show, or do anything else. Nonno knows not to get in your way too much. Zoe used to act the same way when grandparents visited when she was your age. That's just how it is. You see them so seldom that you don't know them.
I love you my Echo. I will try to write more often.
Mommy.
Monday, November 13, 2017
Sunday, June 25, 2017
You are 3 years old!
My Love Echo,
You slept with us in the big bed the night before your birthday. On a peaceful Sunday morning, I woke you up with kisses and happy birthday wishes. "Is it my birthday? Am I a birthday girl?" you asked, with smile and disbelief. "Yes," I said. "It's your birthday my love. Happy birthday!" "Am I a birthday girl?" finally reaching a cherished longing.
You are not as emotionally revealing as Zoe so sometimes it's hard to tell how much something means to you. You saw birthday parties where kids blow candles, get gifts or just radiate with the awareness of being special. Not understand why and whether your turn will come, you take it in sucking your thumb. It's so hard to be a child and you are so dear to me that it breaks my heart.
We celebrated Zoe's birthday a few months early this year so she could have more of her school friends over. When we went to the bakery to pick her cake, I asked you to pick your birthday cake too. Excited, you looked through the pictures, and easily set your heart on a My Little Pony's cake with Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle characters. But your birthday was still 2 months away, which had no meaning for you. It's interesting as a grownup to see how the concept of time and of space does not exist for kids. Or maybe it does but in a non-linear way. So it's always tricky to find the right way to talk about things that happen over time. On and off we talked about the cake and what gifts you wanted - which too, were ponies.
The day before your birthday, we decorated the house and went back to the bakery to order your cake. You still wanted the Ponies cake. "We're going to eat it," you said, implying today. Again explain that we'll have the cake tomorrow.
On your birthday, we went to pick up your cake. In every occasion Zoe made it known to others that it was her little sister's birthday. In the afternoon, our friend Geniva came to celebrate you with us. I revealed the big cupcake pinata I was hiding upstairs that Zoe filled with chocolate and candy the day before. Evert since our camping trip last year, you love the idea of banging pinata and having a candy rain.
You slept with us in the big bed the night before your birthday. On a peaceful Sunday morning, I woke you up with kisses and happy birthday wishes. "Is it my birthday? Am I a birthday girl?" you asked, with smile and disbelief. "Yes," I said. "It's your birthday my love. Happy birthday!" "Am I a birthday girl?" finally reaching a cherished longing.
You are not as emotionally revealing as Zoe so sometimes it's hard to tell how much something means to you. You saw birthday parties where kids blow candles, get gifts or just radiate with the awareness of being special. Not understand why and whether your turn will come, you take it in sucking your thumb. It's so hard to be a child and you are so dear to me that it breaks my heart.
We celebrated Zoe's birthday a few months early this year so she could have more of her school friends over. When we went to the bakery to pick her cake, I asked you to pick your birthday cake too. Excited, you looked through the pictures, and easily set your heart on a My Little Pony's cake with Rainbow Dash and Twilight Sparkle characters. But your birthday was still 2 months away, which had no meaning for you. It's interesting as a grownup to see how the concept of time and of space does not exist for kids. Or maybe it does but in a non-linear way. So it's always tricky to find the right way to talk about things that happen over time. On and off we talked about the cake and what gifts you wanted - which too, were ponies.
The day before your birthday, we decorated the house and went back to the bakery to order your cake. You still wanted the Ponies cake. "We're going to eat it," you said, implying today. Again explain that we'll have the cake tomorrow.
On your birthday, we went to pick up your cake. In every occasion Zoe made it known to others that it was her little sister's birthday. In the afternoon, our friend Geniva came to celebrate you with us. I revealed the big cupcake pinata I was hiding upstairs that Zoe filled with chocolate and candy the day before. Evert since our camping trip last year, you love the idea of banging pinata and having a candy rain.
You were so happy blowing the
candles on your colorful cake, and eating the frosting.
The next day we planned a
celebration with your friends and teachers at daycare. In the afternoon, all
three of us came to your class with cupcakes, shakers, underwater themed
plates... I was pleasantly surprised when I saw the classroom was already
decorated with a "Happy Birthday" sign. You were wearing a beautiful
crown of colorful candles, and glowing with confidence. Your staple smile that
leaves all else in the shadows was on your face. Your teacher Halley said you
refused to take it off all day, except at nap time. You must have been boiling
with excitement all day.
We started off with reading books to your classmates. You sat on
my lap on the couch, while Zoe sat with the audience on the carpet in front of
us, holding Marella on her lap. Papa took pictures. After the book reading, everybody
sang happy birthday to Echo as you blew the candles, ate cupcakes, and shook
the little shakers to the rhythm of various songs, drew pictures and popped
bubbles. As your friends continued with their routine, all four of us headed
back home still decorated for your birthday.
I'm looking forward to every
birthday we will celebrate together, year after year.
I love you.
Mommy.
Monday, June 12, 2017
Playful, Rebellious and Loving
My Echo,
You are pretty much potty trained. We diaper you at night, but you wake up dry. You stopped pooping on yourself forever. But lately, you've been having too many pee accidents. We've been doing a ton of carpet and floor cleaning, and extra loads of laundry. You refuse to sit on the toilet and pee. Both at home and at daycare, pee time became a stressful and time consuming ordeal involving incentives, entertainment and frustration. You stiffen yourself up so we can't make you sit by force. Last week we went to the movie theater. On the way out, I asked dad to take you to the bathroom. "Nothing came out" you said. 2 minutes later in the car "I need to go to the bathroom" you said. We stopped the car, your seat was already wet. I pulled you out and held you on the grass, to let you finish your business. You started pooping, like dog, outside some stranger;s house. My arms and legs were hurting from holding you hovering above the ground. Worried that the owner of the house would step out, I asked if you were done. "I'm pooping I'm pooping. OI'm not done yet!" you said every time. Papa gathered your droppings in a bag, as I wiped your butt. We were beyond frustrated as this was only one if the many accidents that weekend. In the car I said that if you continue with not going to the bathroom we might have to give it away. You became quiet. Zoe started crying.
Since I wasn't really going to give you away, I had to resort (re-resort) to the oldest trick in the book: Bribe you with M&Ms. Of course, it worked, but for how long do you expect to get M&Ms in exchange for pee?
You continue to love me and want to be with me. I feel the same toward you. You climb on my lap on the couch and say "I want all of you. I don't want to share you." At bed time, all three of us cuddle for a little while. "I want to be so close to you," you say, as you snuggle up against me. At other times, you continue to say "you are mine! I'm going to keep you forever. And you are not going to die." It's tricky to deal with such statements. I don't want to scare you but I also don't want to die. So I try to balance it all. "Everyone dies, but I'm not going to die soon," I say sometimes. Once you kept probing and I said I'll die when I"m older, not now. "But you are not getting old," you said. I let it go. Yes, I said, I'm not old yet.
I want to be with you forever too, Echo.
Love,
Mommy.
You are pretty much potty trained. We diaper you at night, but you wake up dry. You stopped pooping on yourself forever. But lately, you've been having too many pee accidents. We've been doing a ton of carpet and floor cleaning, and extra loads of laundry. You refuse to sit on the toilet and pee. Both at home and at daycare, pee time became a stressful and time consuming ordeal involving incentives, entertainment and frustration. You stiffen yourself up so we can't make you sit by force. Last week we went to the movie theater. On the way out, I asked dad to take you to the bathroom. "Nothing came out" you said. 2 minutes later in the car "I need to go to the bathroom" you said. We stopped the car, your seat was already wet. I pulled you out and held you on the grass, to let you finish your business. You started pooping, like dog, outside some stranger;s house. My arms and legs were hurting from holding you hovering above the ground. Worried that the owner of the house would step out, I asked if you were done. "I'm pooping I'm pooping. OI'm not done yet!" you said every time. Papa gathered your droppings in a bag, as I wiped your butt. We were beyond frustrated as this was only one if the many accidents that weekend. In the car I said that if you continue with not going to the bathroom we might have to give it away. You became quiet. Zoe started crying.
Since I wasn't really going to give you away, I had to resort (re-resort) to the oldest trick in the book: Bribe you with M&Ms. Of course, it worked, but for how long do you expect to get M&Ms in exchange for pee?
You continue to love me and want to be with me. I feel the same toward you. You climb on my lap on the couch and say "I want all of you. I don't want to share you." At bed time, all three of us cuddle for a little while. "I want to be so close to you," you say, as you snuggle up against me. At other times, you continue to say "you are mine! I'm going to keep you forever. And you are not going to die." It's tricky to deal with such statements. I don't want to scare you but I also don't want to die. So I try to balance it all. "Everyone dies, but I'm not going to die soon," I say sometimes. Once you kept probing and I said I'll die when I"m older, not now. "But you are not getting old," you said. I let it go. Yes, I said, I'm not old yet.
I want to be with you forever too, Echo.
Love,
Mommy.
Friday, April 28, 2017
Mama Love, My Little Librarian
My love Echo,
Lately, you've been claiming ownership of people you care about. I'm pretty sure I'm at the top of your list.
Echo: "You are mine! I'm going to keep you forever. Don't die, and don't get lost."
I love you too, my Echo:-).
Speaking of getting lost, we were at the neighborhood park for Zoe's soccer practice. After the practice all the kids went to play in the area with a few tall trees, while the parents chatted. At some point, papa and I saw you run out of the wooded area into the clearance, looking distressed. When you saw us, you started running our way. We hugged you, and asked you what happened. You searched for words, and then finally you said:
"I was in the jungle. Then I was gone. I couldn't find myself." Did you get lost, papa asked. "Yes, I got lost in the jungle," you said. I love the way you express yourself.
But you found us!, we said, with a smile. "Yes," you said happy.
One of your teachers has been asking me to come to your class for book reading one day. This week, I finally made the commitment. I wanted to make sure I bring books that you all can relate, understand and enjoy from the get go - unlike some books that you grow to love more after a couple of readings, as you understand the details. I remembered that a few months ago, we really enjoyed one of the library books we checked out, but I couldn't remember the name. When we went back to the library to look for it, I didn't know where to begin. I couldn't quite remember the plot, or the characters. I told the librarian that we were looking for a book about a couple of animal characters, though I wasn't sure what they were - a bunny? a squirrel? I had no idea. I said they had a red balloon that flew away, and they were chasing it... We both like the book... Naturally, she looked at me, clueless. I said one of the title words was Pip. All this time, I was carrying you in my arms, and apparently, you were attentively listening to the conversation. "And Posy" you said. I looked at you in disbelief, amazement, admiration. That's it!Pip and Posy was the name! The librarian was very surprised as well. It's been several months since we checked out that book, and we had it for only a couple of days. You always listen, think, and quietly process what you hear.
I love you my little star!
Mommy
Lately, you've been claiming ownership of people you care about. I'm pretty sure I'm at the top of your list.
Echo: "You are mine! I'm going to keep you forever. Don't die, and don't get lost."
I love you too, my Echo:-).
Speaking of getting lost, we were at the neighborhood park for Zoe's soccer practice. After the practice all the kids went to play in the area with a few tall trees, while the parents chatted. At some point, papa and I saw you run out of the wooded area into the clearance, looking distressed. When you saw us, you started running our way. We hugged you, and asked you what happened. You searched for words, and then finally you said:
"I was in the jungle. Then I was gone. I couldn't find myself." Did you get lost, papa asked. "Yes, I got lost in the jungle," you said. I love the way you express yourself.
But you found us!, we said, with a smile. "Yes," you said happy.
One of your teachers has been asking me to come to your class for book reading one day. This week, I finally made the commitment. I wanted to make sure I bring books that you all can relate, understand and enjoy from the get go - unlike some books that you grow to love more after a couple of readings, as you understand the details. I remembered that a few months ago, we really enjoyed one of the library books we checked out, but I couldn't remember the name. When we went back to the library to look for it, I didn't know where to begin. I couldn't quite remember the plot, or the characters. I told the librarian that we were looking for a book about a couple of animal characters, though I wasn't sure what they were - a bunny? a squirrel? I had no idea. I said they had a red balloon that flew away, and they were chasing it... We both like the book... Naturally, she looked at me, clueless. I said one of the title words was Pip. All this time, I was carrying you in my arms, and apparently, you were attentively listening to the conversation. "And Posy" you said. I looked at you in disbelief, amazement, admiration. That's it!Pip and Posy was the name! The librarian was very surprised as well. It's been several months since we checked out that book, and we had it for only a couple of days. You always listen, think, and quietly process what you hear.
I love you my little star!
Mommy
Monday, March 20, 2017
Recollection of months past
My Dear Echo,
It's been almost 3 months since I last wrote in your blog. We've been busy having fun, with lots of family time. First the Holiday Season, then the mid-winter school break. You discovered ice skating and skiing, and you love them all.
Initially, for the mid-winter break, we planned a family ski trip to a Canadian ski resort with daycare, where we would leave you while we go skiing, because you are too young to qualify for any ski lessons. I pictured us dropping you off, and heading out to the snowy mountains, adorned in ski gear, enjoying the air, the snow, the speed, and the beautiful scenery. You, crying as we part, your arms reaching to the air, as I walk away; locked up in a windowless room all day, wearing a pair of soft pants for comfort. I can't do it, I said.
We still took the time off work, and instead of going to a ski resort in Canada, we drove every other day to the local ski mountain Snoqualmie. You still didn't qualify for ski lessons, but we rented skis and boots for you, and took you skiing ourselves, in a pair of brand new pink goggles. Some of the time Zoe was in ski lessons, and other times she skied with us. You loved it. You learned to ski straight onto the magic carpet and let it take you up the hill. But you loved the chairlift more. Both you and Zoe have been enjoying skiing so much, that we've been going to the mountains past the school break. Papa has been doing a lot of driving these days. We decided to go for night skiing one Friday after school, so I can test a new pair of skis. Inching our way through Seattle rain traffic, half way into our trip, you started vomiting. Your ski outfit was soaked and nasty. We still had a long way to go and it was getting late, so we decided to bail out and head back. First Zoe started crying, because she was so looking forward to skiing. It took you a while to understand that we changed out plans. And when you did understand, you started crying "I wanna go kiing, I wanna go kiing." We decided to go to a mall in the area to keep you two happy and entertained while waiting for the traffic to die down, and to get you into clean clothes. And we went back skiing a few days later! Nine and Dede came with us too, as they were in town visiting. More on that in a separate post.
---------
"Are You Happy?"
You are sweetly concerned about how I feel, and you want me to be happy. We just came home after a long day, and I was rushing to clean up your lunch boxes, getting dinner ready, and also preparing snacks for you and Zoe who is always hungry. Early evenings are crazy times. You just peed or pooped and needed washing. I washed your butt in the sink, and in a hurry, passed you the towel, asking to dry yourself. No, you said. You do it. I sighed, as I took back the towel. I mush have had an expression that triggered something. You paused, looked at me, and asked "are you happy?" "Do I look happy?" I said. "I just got home, I have so much to do, I just asked you to dry yourself with the towel, and you said no. So no, I'm not happy about that." When I was done drying you, I went to the kitchen. Shortly, after, you showed up, wearing diapers and pants! "Did you dress yourself?" I asked, with excitement. I gave you a big hug, a big kiss and thanked you. "I put my clothes on. Are you happy?" you asked. "Yes, I'm very happy. YOU make me happy." I said. You looked happy and beaming. "I made you happy," you said. Ever since that day, you've been asking the same question every time you notice an expression of discontent on my face. It is so sweet of you to check on me like this. Many times after I wash your butt, you go grab clothes, saying "I will make you happy," and put them on by yourself. You are a very special girl.
--------
Valentines!
Everything is a celebration with girls, and Valentine's Day tops the list! Last year we spent the night in a downtown hotel. This year, I prepared a big basket of gifts, treats and Valentines art supplies. We decorated the house together the night before. We also set the dinner table appropriately for the theme of the event, and papa brought just the right balloon!
The excitement was spectacular. I will miss these excitements when you girls are all grown up.
---------
"I'm Drowning!"
You are a funny girl, Echo. You do strange things intentionally, just to make us laugh. At dinner table one night you slowly moved down down down below the table level, yelling "I'm drowning, I'm drowning." We all broke into laughter and said "you are funny Echo!" "I'm funny!"
-----------
Thumb Love!
Sometimes we stop by the library across from your daycare, on the way home. One evening, you picked a book about a girl, Lulu, who used to be a thumb sucker, but eventually gave up on the habit. You made me read it again and again, each time, getting a little scared when she relay a nightmare where her front teeth grew so big, like a rabbit due to thumb sucking. You pulled your thumb out, but eventually, it made its way back in. Sooner or later, you will stop sucking your thumb, my little sunshine.
I love you, Echo.
Mommy
It's been almost 3 months since I last wrote in your blog. We've been busy having fun, with lots of family time. First the Holiday Season, then the mid-winter school break. You discovered ice skating and skiing, and you love them all.
Initially, for the mid-winter break, we planned a family ski trip to a Canadian ski resort with daycare, where we would leave you while we go skiing, because you are too young to qualify for any ski lessons. I pictured us dropping you off, and heading out to the snowy mountains, adorned in ski gear, enjoying the air, the snow, the speed, and the beautiful scenery. You, crying as we part, your arms reaching to the air, as I walk away; locked up in a windowless room all day, wearing a pair of soft pants for comfort. I can't do it, I said.
We still took the time off work, and instead of going to a ski resort in Canada, we drove every other day to the local ski mountain Snoqualmie. You still didn't qualify for ski lessons, but we rented skis and boots for you, and took you skiing ourselves, in a pair of brand new pink goggles. Some of the time Zoe was in ski lessons, and other times she skied with us. You loved it. You learned to ski straight onto the magic carpet and let it take you up the hill. But you loved the chairlift more. Both you and Zoe have been enjoying skiing so much, that we've been going to the mountains past the school break. Papa has been doing a lot of driving these days. We decided to go for night skiing one Friday after school, so I can test a new pair of skis. Inching our way through Seattle rain traffic, half way into our trip, you started vomiting. Your ski outfit was soaked and nasty. We still had a long way to go and it was getting late, so we decided to bail out and head back. First Zoe started crying, because she was so looking forward to skiing. It took you a while to understand that we changed out plans. And when you did understand, you started crying "I wanna go kiing, I wanna go kiing." We decided to go to a mall in the area to keep you two happy and entertained while waiting for the traffic to die down, and to get you into clean clothes. And we went back skiing a few days later! Nine and Dede came with us too, as they were in town visiting. More on that in a separate post.
---------
"Are You Happy?"
You are sweetly concerned about how I feel, and you want me to be happy. We just came home after a long day, and I was rushing to clean up your lunch boxes, getting dinner ready, and also preparing snacks for you and Zoe who is always hungry. Early evenings are crazy times. You just peed or pooped and needed washing. I washed your butt in the sink, and in a hurry, passed you the towel, asking to dry yourself. No, you said. You do it. I sighed, as I took back the towel. I mush have had an expression that triggered something. You paused, looked at me, and asked "are you happy?" "Do I look happy?" I said. "I just got home, I have so much to do, I just asked you to dry yourself with the towel, and you said no. So no, I'm not happy about that." When I was done drying you, I went to the kitchen. Shortly, after, you showed up, wearing diapers and pants! "Did you dress yourself?" I asked, with excitement. I gave you a big hug, a big kiss and thanked you. "I put my clothes on. Are you happy?" you asked. "Yes, I'm very happy. YOU make me happy." I said. You looked happy and beaming. "I made you happy," you said. Ever since that day, you've been asking the same question every time you notice an expression of discontent on my face. It is so sweet of you to check on me like this. Many times after I wash your butt, you go grab clothes, saying "I will make you happy," and put them on by yourself. You are a very special girl.
--------
Valentines!
Everything is a celebration with girls, and Valentine's Day tops the list! Last year we spent the night in a downtown hotel. This year, I prepared a big basket of gifts, treats and Valentines art supplies. We decorated the house together the night before. We also set the dinner table appropriately for the theme of the event, and papa brought just the right balloon!
The excitement was spectacular. I will miss these excitements when you girls are all grown up.
---------
"I'm Drowning!"
You are a funny girl, Echo. You do strange things intentionally, just to make us laugh. At dinner table one night you slowly moved down down down below the table level, yelling "I'm drowning, I'm drowning." We all broke into laughter and said "you are funny Echo!" "I'm funny!"
-----------
Thumb Love!
Sometimes we stop by the library across from your daycare, on the way home. One evening, you picked a book about a girl, Lulu, who used to be a thumb sucker, but eventually gave up on the habit. You made me read it again and again, each time, getting a little scared when she relay a nightmare where her front teeth grew so big, like a rabbit due to thumb sucking. You pulled your thumb out, but eventually, it made its way back in. Sooner or later, you will stop sucking your thumb, my little sunshine.
I love you, Echo.
Mommy
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