Six-month checkup

Baby Echo,

I consistently fall behind on updates about your life. So is the fate of a second born to a working mom. On the other hand, every ounce of time I find, I spend it with you, than in the solitude of a blog entry. Only when you sleep, do I make time.

That is my justification of delayed news, though when you grow up, I doubt you'll need justification, because you know you are loved. I see it when you turn your ear toward my footsteps, in your arms and legs kicking the air, ready to dart toward me, and in your bright smile watching me come close.

Last week was your 6-month checkup. Here are your new specs:

Weight: 15lb 3oz(6.9 kg).
Height: 26" (66 cm) I think the nurse measured wrong. We'll have an update in your 9 month checkup.
Head circumference: 16"
Vaccines: All up to date.

I think your nurse hates her life, and it shows in the way she vaccinates.

You are still a thumb sucker, though not as much, you barely spit anymore, you continue nursing like a little cub, you experiment with different foods at dinner time and you scream when you are sleepy but don't want to fall trap to it while we are all up and partying. Similarly your sister Zoe won't go to bed as long as you are up. So nights are long, and the time papa and I are supposed to have to

ourselves are dominated by you two. We've created two monsters.

Love,

Mommy

First Teeth

We were having brunch at Salmon Bay Cafe yesterday. You were on my lap, all smiles, as usual. There they were. Two tiny pearls peaking out of your lower gums. Barely visible, but there. I saw them, papa saw them, Zoe saw them.

I love you.
Mommy

Waiting for yogurt

My Little Echo,

Family dinner time is no longer nursing time. You watch the plates, you watch the mouths moving as you move yours. you get excited, moving forward, arms and legs in the air, noises of rebellion coming from your mouth. I turn you to the boob, but you push away, angry and turn your head back at the table.

We bring in yogurt in a little cup and a tiny spoon, and you eat and eat. At first, you didn't like yogurt. We tried different yogurt brands and found one that you like. you didn't know to open your mouth or to swallow. Then you wanted to eat, but didn't know what to make of a spoon. you licked the yogurt like a little kitten. One day you figured out to open your mouth. If I pause for a moment to feed myself or for whatever reason, you get upset, even red in the face and lean forward for more, until the little cup is empty. Zoe comes to give you a few spoons a well. She likes feeding her little sister.

We also tested a few other foods, but for now, we'll stick to yogurt for a couple of weeks.

Your first food, though, are apples. When I eat apples,you want some too. I hold it for you and you suck it like a popsicle. But I think apples make you constipated, so we are going easy on that.

I love you so, my little one.
Mommy

Las Vegas baby

My little traveler,

I had to fly to Las Vegas for work, and you, my little Echo, is still nursing. So you came along, and so did Nine Roza, to take care of you. You spent the day at the Venetian, strolling along the casinos - not gambling though -

and Venice themed halls with

 high end shops along canals, and blue Mediterranean sky - indoors. You and nine explored while I worked, so at break time, you two took me to a place worth seeing - the Grand Canal Walk. We sat at the piazza and had gelato and coffee, overlooking the canal, as the gondola men sang. The coffee was drip, the gelato was anything else but. But we were together, and you were happy, and that's all that mattered.

At feeding times I ran down long corridors to meet you at the same spot each meal. Feeding you was tough. You were fascinated by the crowd, colors and sounds, and did not want to tuck your head and nurse. Since we had only a few minutes before I had to go back to work, Nine and I were nervous, worried about the wait time until the next feeding.

Most of the time things worked out. The second night no one was in the room when I came back. I called Nine, but her phone rang in the room. Where can they be, I thought, worried, telling myself there is nothing to worry about. I ran down the hallway - that's what I did most during the Vegas trip - took the elevator down and zoomed to the big lobby, eyes, browsing left, right, far and near, until I spotted the green stroller and Nine, pushing it back and forth, so you calm down. Turns out you had a crying fit. Hunger maybe? We went upstairs to nurse, and you were jolly as a clam, awake, with no intent to sleep.

I was glad and relieved when all was over, and it was time to head to the airport. We were lucky and I was thankful that Nine was there with her patience, love, and dedication.

Love,
Mommy

First day without you grandfater

My Dear Echo,

When you first met Dede, you cried. Then you saw that I was smiling. You shifted your gaze between me and him, trying to decide on an emotion. You ultimately settled on a smile, which you carried for him until his departure. And with that, you made him very happy, and very sad, when it was time for him to leave.

You went on walks at the park, looked out the window, one of your favorite pass times, played, had conversations, and when you finally fell tired, Dede's shoulder mad ea pretty good bed.

You, my dear little baby, are very easy to love. I miss you while you are napping. I can't imagine how it's like to part from you indefinitely.

Love,
Mommy

Your first fever

My lovely little girl,

The bug hit Papa first, then Zoe, then you. You were a little more willing to sleep, more mellow, less hungry, albeit as smiley. It was hard to tell if you were coming down with something. Late at night, I woke up and you were warm. The famous butt temperature showed fever, but not high enough to go to the emergency room. By 6am you were warmer, so I waited until the doctor's office opened, and went first thing, without appointment. They saw you.

You were sweet, as always. You don't like the sound of the paper sheet on the examination bed. She said you could have infant Tylenol, and nothing else. You slept on Dede's shoulder, who's come from Istanbul to meet you,and to see Zoe. Nine Roza has been bundling you even more. She is always cold, and thinks everyone feels the same. Your fever went down, but the congestion has not left, which makes nursing frustrating for you, and worrisome for me. We've been trying saline and fresh air. I think this afternoon you started breathing a little more easily.

We are here to take care of you, little lovely creature.

Love,
Mommy

You are four months old!

My lovely girl!

You are four months old! At

64cm height,
6.26kg weight,
39cm head circumference,

you are a beautiful little happiness.

You have grown a lot. You are grabbing things intentionally, flipping over, loving mama, and still, smiling long and wide with joyful eyes. Nursing takes longer, because you are already interested in anything else around. You love gazing out the windows, looking at the sky, and the leaves and branches that dance in the wind. Your sister Zoe loves to snuggle with you and you love being around her. But after a few minutes in bed, you start making sounds of discomfort.

At Zoe's bedtime - a battle that lasts for multiple hours - papa or I read a book, and you too, listen.

We put out a similar battle for your bed time as well, switching between nursing, bouncing, walking, spitting...You two were not made for sleep. Once you are a bit older, our plan is to read the two of you a book and leave you in one of the bedrooms together. You can sleep, chat or party all night together.

Love,
Mommy

Working girls

Dear Baby Echo,

Last week we were all busy working. There were work related events all week in multiple locations in downtown Seattle, and we had to come up with ways to keep you fed.

In the weeks leading to the events, we tried multiple times getting you to use the bottle, and every attempt ended in failure. These were full day events, and the little you, cannot stay away from mama's boobs for longer than 3 hours. So each day, you, me and Nine Roza headed out to downtown together. We left in the wee hours of the morning, and still got stuck in traffic. I made sure you nursed right before we left the house, and as soon as we reached downtown, if you were awake. Then Nine and I synced to meet every few hours at a specific location for nursing and diaper changing as the day progressed. In between feedings, she walked around town with you in the stroller, sat at coffee shops to bounce you up and down for entertainment - like your sister Zoe, you too aren't a sleeper, so we need to come up with continuous activities to keep you engaged. If we bore you, you get angry. Otherwise, you keep on smiling.

Some meeting locations were far apart, and Nine couldn't come all the way, so papa took time off from work and swapped with Nine. He sat at a cafe right across from my location, and when it was time, I rushed down, ran across the street, held your excited little body, and the feeding started. When we were done, I passed you back to dad, and zoomed back up. Same with nine, the same scene repeated every few hours. Sometimes you were ok when I came down, sometimes you were crying of hunger, which made me feel terrible.

The first feeding was a learning experience. I ran down to meet Nine, fed you, and ran back up to a meeting. When I came down for the second time, I noticed that my nursing bra flap was open, dangling down. The shame, the embarrassment, I didn't want to go back up to face the people. I was wearing a light ivory shirt, and had hard time believing that people didn't notice the open flap and the nipple. Nine consoled me by saying that the chest pocket of my shirt must have concealed things, but I can't be sure. From than on I made sure the bra was snapped properly.

Overall, it was super stressful. We all coordinated, cooperated and were happy when the week was over.

Love,
Mommy

Flip

Today you flipped over! You've been turning to your side for a while now. Today, when you woke up from a nap, you flipped over to your back. Nine Roza wondered if I flipped you, but to be sure, she came upstairs where I was working, and asked. I ran downstairs to your room, and as a proud mama, I took pictures of your smiley face.

Little Echo is 3 months old

My tiny Echo,

Nine says that I treat you as though I had a baby for the very first time. That's exactly how I feel. Having had our Zoe first, didn't diminish my excitement or my love. I adore you. That is the word. I look forward to your happy smile, your gaze, your ever moving legs. I look forward to holding you, lifting you and kissing you all over. You are a happy baby. But I like to think that you are even happier when you see me. I took a job that allowed me to work from home, so I can be with you more. I'm grateful that I can nurse you and bounce you during the day. Still, I feel the right thing to do is to spend all day together. I want to see you crawl and walk, but I don't want you to grow. But you will. And until then, I want to enjoy every bit of you.

As a second born, you don't get to taste undivided attention that first borns do. It makes me a little sad that even when nursing, I don't always sing to you or talk to you, because I also want to pay attention to your sister Zoe, if she is in the room. On the other hand, when we are all together, you lock your gaze on Zoe. You open your eyes and mouth wide, in a smile of amazement, evidently fascinated by her presence and energy.

Today you are three months old. You look and act older. You are about 5.5 kilos and about 55cm.

And you started flipping to your side already.

Tonight we'll have some cupcakes or chocolates to celebrate your 3 month long life and Zoe's sisterhood. I want the months to pass fast, as reassurance that you are prospering, and I want them to pass slow. I love you, my little honey bee. Welcome to my life.

Mommy

Your first camping trip

My Dear Echo,

This weekend we went on our first family camping trip. More like a low-cost hotel stay than a union with nature. With Zoe not wanting to hike and getting easily bored, and you spitting so much, going all natural would have been unpleasant. We picked a campground with bathrooms, a pool and a laundromat, about 2 miles outside the "Bavarian" town of Leavenworth, created by non-Bavarian Americans.

Nights in the tent were cold. With one warm sleeping bag and two thermal pads, we took turns as needed, and snuggled tightly to keep each other toasty. Twisting in the narrow bag for nursing required skill which we acquired on the go.

 

Days were hot... We played games and told stories to entertain your sister Zoe, and longed for the peaceful moment to sit back on the lounge chairs, overlooking the river, and sip a glass of wine. 

We walked down to the river with clear waters ice cold from melted snow and giant round rocks decorating the shores. Zoe dipped her legs, and papa and I went for a quick swim. Next time you will go in as well.

I love holding you and making you smile. 

On the drive back home you cried. I think you are having hard time falling asleep without nursing. So I moved to the back seat and nursed you, hoping that a police car would not drive by. 

Your sister watched a video of a little boy protecting his baby sister. Now she thinks it is her responsibility to protect you. It's very cute to listen to her talk about it. I tell her that it is also your responsibility to protect her.

Love,

Mommy

Achievements

My Little Echo,

August 19, 2014. I looked over the green play mat where you were napping, and saw your little body propped up on elbows and lower arms. Your little head, with your big eyes moved from side to side, observing your surroundings. This is a big achievement for a two-month old little girl.

You poop only once or twice a day, but it's big and pressurized.When it's out, it makes you smile. Usually it stains your onesie and the car seat, if you are in it. Last week, you pooped while on your changing table, and it shot two feet far, hitting papa's hand, and from there, it bounced onto your crib and the floor.

You started reaching to things with your dainty hands. You try to hold my hands so I lift you up on your feet. today I was making funny sounds with my mouth. You focused with laser eyes on my lips, lifted your hand and caught my lips, to understand what they were doing.

The days of peaceful Echo are behind. You are still smiley and sweet, but you are up and awake and ready to play. You don't want to be left alone, and if I'm late at feeding you, you get angry and yell "Aeh!" I don't know if you can't sleep or resist sleep. Nine (she came to visit us and take care of you while I work) says that I don't let you sleep. I disagree. I just don't want to force you to sleep if you want to be awake and have fun with mama. I want to stimulate your shiny big eyes, and smart little brain, and I want to see that trusting wide smile - not pictured in the photo below, with Nine and sister Zoe.

Love,
 Mommy

You are older than you are

My Dear Echo,

You shared your first smile when you were one week old. It was a conscious smile, intended for me. Within a week or two, you started imitating my face - you stuck your tongue out, as you watched me stick out mine. You pursed your lips into a kiss, as you watched me do the same:

You are happiest when you push yourself up to standing with our support. You look down at your legs with a smile of achievement that's different than your other smiles, and then, into our eyes. We can tell you're proud of yourself, and you feel even more proud as you notice our amazement and congratulatory remarks. You're not even 2 months old.

You also started "talking" to me with consistent sounds. I reply with regular language, and so we carry a conversation only a baby and mommy can share.

You are calm, so you give yourself a chance to observe your surroundings, quiet, and with eyes wide open - your eyes are so big! - and you are amazed at what you see. We wonder what crosses through your mind.

You are too young for all this.

Wherever I go, people from every age and gender stop me and comment on on you. "You probably hear this all the time, but you have the cutest baby." "Your baby is adorable." "Aww, so cute." "She looks so grown up." "She is so alert." In return, you give them your beaming smile.

You had a rough day yesterday, with 4 vaccines. 3 shots in the legs and 1 drop in the mouth. You were sleepy, a little cranky, and had some fever. It's hard to be a baby. But you made it through. My lovely little girl.

Kiss,
Mommy

Welcome to the world, Echo

My Echo,

We've been waiting for you to complete our family. You kept us waiting for three extra days, and those felt like weeks. I was worried that you'd be too big to come out easily, your dad wanted to meet you already, and your sister was getting sad that her baby and playmate was not here yet. When you did decide to arrive, you came quickly and quietly.

A sunny June 18 after days of rain. I was on the couch, surfing and casually timing the contractions I've been feeling for the last 2-3 weeks. "Not strong enough for labor" I thought. Following that thought, an unfamiliar pop and painful wetness. My water never broke with your sister, so I was totally unprepared for this horrible sensation. "Not on the carpet" I whispered in my head, and dragged myself on my knees to the hardwood floor. The phone was left miles away on the couch, and  knew papa might not hear it ring as he was picking up Zoe from school on the bike.

Doctors tell you to time your contractions to know how close you are to delivery. But once you have given birth, you know from the degree of pain how close you are to the end, and I knew I had no time. Before this moment, I told myself that if I can't reach dad, or if he is farther away, I'll just suck it up and drive myself to the hospital. Crouched on the floor, that was not going to happen. I reached for the phone and pressed the single button it takes to dial dad, hating the traffic that must have trapped him. "Is it time?" he said as soon as he picked up the phone. "Yes, how far are you?" "We're very close" he said, and I heard the garage door open.

Something stressful about driving to a hospital during rush hour traffic. Thirty minutes later we were at the hospital door. 60 minutes later, at 7:11PM Pacific time, you were in my arms. "Mom! A baby just came out of your snooch!" your sister declared. "She is so small,"I said,several times, worried. "Is she preemie size?" I asked. "She is just fine," they said. I had hard time believing. 'Is she breathing?" I asked? "Yes" they said. "Why is she not crying?" I asked. "Why is the doctor not smacking her?" I thought. Nobody seemed to understand why I was worried. You looked so small and you were so quiet. Why didn't you cry? Only in the next few days, as I got to know you I understood... You are just a peaceful baby. Your presence sooths me. I'm so lucky that you are mine.

Papa and I were surprised that only after a few minutes, you opened your eyes. you looked like a mini human who's been through life. We positioned you on my chest, and you nursed for two long hours until the nurse came to take your vitals.

You were born 6lb 12oz (3.65kg) and 19.5 inches (almost 50 cm). You have been making us smile ever since.

Love
Mommy